I Smell ....

Today as I went visiting and ran my errands .. I could hear folks saying to each other ... "I smell pancakes." or "I smell grilled cheese" or "I smell (fill in the blank with a food item)"

I would nonchalantly go about my business ... all the while knowing I was the subject causing everyone's senses to immediately turn from their present thoughts or conversations to FOOD.

The real culprit .... dum de dum dum ...the hotel microwave .. now banished to the balcony outside my room, where I might add it has a glorious oceanfront view. : )

Yesterday, I was getting tired of cold food for every meal, so I walked to Walgreen's, which is a mile round-trip, to buy myself a "meal" (and I use that term loosely) to cook in the hotel microwave that would feel warm in my tummy. The winning selection from the drugstore grocery shelves was a cup of Velveeta Shells and Cheese. ummmmm

So, at lunchtime today .. I peeled back the cover, removed the foil packet containing the Velveeta cheese, filled with water to the waterline, and placed in the microwave for the requisite amount of time ... 3.5 minutes.

Now .. this is the part I debated about leaving out ... but here goes. Since I had 3.5 minutes to idle away while my shells cooked, I decided to take this time to run to the lobby for my morning coffee which I had yet to have ..and I MUST have my coffee. This would take about the same amount of time that as my shells. So I picked up my room key - my travel mug - and off to the lobby to get coffee.

Gone just a few minutes ... I came off the elevator, coffee in hand, on the 2nd floor and heard a fire alarm in a room going off. WELL - since this hotel only had about 5 patrons in the entire 8 floor structure ... I picked up my pace and started to run to my room.

At the door I could see smoke pouring out thru the door .. OH GREAT !! My door to Room 201 had been troublesome since the first day, but I was not on any time schedule this trip, so I had never reported it to hotel management. Now I was in panic mode because the troublesome door was wasting precious moments.

I finally got the door to the room open .. and when I did .. the smoke poured into the hallway and the loud hotel fire alarms started going off .... SHIT !! I quickly (which I now realize was a mistake) opened the microwave door to peek and as the smelly black cloud of smoke emerged ~ the alarms went into high volume overdrive. SHIT

I ran to my room phone and casually announced when the front desk answered "Hi, this is Andrea in Room 201. I burned my lunch in the microwave, so if you hear fire alarms .. don't be concerned ... its just me." Well - my casual tone was evidently not convincing. In seconds I had the owner and the maintenance guy at my door. The maintenance guy unplugged the microwave - and ran to my balcony.

WHEW !! The smoking microwave was gone...but not the smell. Everything in the room, including all the clothing in my very limited wardrobe .... phew.

I had not unscathed clothing to change into .. so I left to visit friends and run errands .. and hence, the "I smells ...." began.

The motto of this story: When the food package reads "Do not leave this product unattended while cooking." BELIEVE IT ~ sniff sniff